- Anti Joke

Who loves George Clooney? George Clooney

Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus.

Ian's mind Elevator music

What did the boy say when he could'nt find his dog? I wonder where Spot went.

What did the cashier say to the blonde? That will be $5.39, would you like a receipt?

how many tentacles did the mentally retarded octopus have? answer: 8!

Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

why did the chicken cross the road cause i fucked your mom

Q: What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede? A: Nothing. She was nowhere to be found during that scene.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

Why are bacon and eggs good. Because Toasters are silver

What's the difference between an egg and a Llama? The'yre both not lamps.

A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

Where did the duck hide its pail? UNDER THE STAIRS!!

Knock Knock the door's open, come in

Why did the girl need a peice of gum after spending 20 minutes parked in the truck with her boyfriend? Because she had spent the last 20 minutes eating sweets, which she couldnt let her mom know she had eaten because her mom calls her fat everyday even though she only weighs 110 pounds, and forces her to only eat vegetables.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

A man with a barbie doll walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "I bet you $100 that I can turn this barbie doll into a beautiful lady". The bartender laughs and says "Okay." The man takes out a brush and begins brushing the doll's hair. Seconds later the man has a seizure and falls to floor a dies. It turns out he was a drug addict and had a fatal over dose. The bartender never got his $100.

What starts with a 's' and ends in 'ex'? Sex -XH

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because seven threatened to murder his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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