What shoes keep dogs quiet? Hush puppies.

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

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What did the kid with all F's on his report card get? Beat by his parents

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How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

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boobs!

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Once upon of time there was a chicken. It crossed the road and everybody made fun of him. The End

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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People with Alzheimers will not remember this joke

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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roses are red , violets are blue i love bernard he loves me too if you take him from my place i'll smash my fist in your face.

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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Q. Why did the Chineese man eat a banana? A. He was hungry, and he was craving a banana.

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Jake snow steals ideas he doesn't make them up

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs? An amputee

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

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I cant find my anti-jokes this is also one

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What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

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What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

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whats my name? Matt

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c-? men, C-men

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops