Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

When A Shouty Man Goes Into His House. His Sister Nearly Kills Him So When A Shouty Man Goes Into A Library. The Books Try To Kill Him.

I guys look at this new game I bought, what is it, it's called penis it's supposed to be toatally hard

a brick cheated on another brick, the brick that was cheated on was angry and became disgusted at the brick that cheated. the current brick that was cheated on tryied top kill the other bitch brick, the brick that cheated tried to break up the fight but testicles

What's black and white and red all over? A piece of discarded newspaper previously covering the half dismembered torso of a dead prostitute.

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

A large commercial airliner is piloted toward inner-city New York. The plane is driven into the World Trade Center by a terrorist. The United States will now issue a holiday to mourn all we have lost in this tragic event.

What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

"The Civil War wasn't won in a day, it was won in a lifetime." -Marc Cruz

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

a boy scout wipes his butt with a dollar cause he had no toilet paper then the other boy scout hears him screaming they meet up later and the other boy scout askes why he was scream and the first boy scout says that is hard to wip your butt with 4 quarters.

What do a banana and helicopter have in common? Neither is a police officer

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

how do u wake up lady gaga? poke her face

A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What will it be?" The homeless man says, "Nothing. I have no money."

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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