The man decides to jump off the bridge and decides to make one last phone call. "Hello, Jane, this is Doug. I just wanted to let you know, from the bottom of my heart, that I love you." Person on the phone says "This is not Jane, this is Joe." "Oh, hi, Joe. Could you just tell your wife what I said. Bye." The man continues to jump down the bridge and swims with his beautiful girlfriend. They all had a great day.

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What's normally shaped like a rectangle, and is so thin, it gives people cuts? Paper.

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10inch nice

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Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

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A horse walks into a bar gets shot then carried away in a helicopter

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What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

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What's the ultimtate guerilla camoflauge at night time? Black people.

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ask me if im a boy are you a boy? none of your buisness.

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A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

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Why doesn't Santa deliver gifts anymore? Because Santa died of a heart attack.

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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have you ever had african food? neither have they

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What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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What happens when you hit a black guy with your car? He is seriously injured.

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Why did the midget fall from a tall building? Because somebody pushed him.

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What do you do when you see an elephant with a basket ball? Engage in play - if the elephant is playing with a basket ball it is most likely domesticated, and if it has toys it's probably well treated. Well-treated elephants raised in captivity are tolerant, sociable, intelligent and playful.

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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A small boy is playing on the sidewalk. Then, he is approached by a black van. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away. Then, the man driving the van says, "So, how was your day, son?"

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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How come grilled cheese?

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A black guy and a white guy jump out of a tree, who hits the ground first? They both hit at the same time while sustaining minor injuries.

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Q.) How do you make a whore blush? A.) Tell her she has pretty eyes.

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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