Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was a busy highway it was hit before making it to halfway.

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Once upon a time, a duck named Jim went to work, he went up to the steps to his new job and and he was paid all day to sit in a hot tub. Little did he know it was a boiling pot and he was served at Christmas dinner

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

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why does horse head huffer keep posting here? because he really doesn't understand the concept.

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What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

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what did the person with yellow teeth and the person with white teeth have in common? they have a nose.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

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2 guys shot up a morgue..... 13 bodies remain dead.

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What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno ask the chicken

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Knock Knock. Doors open

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

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What's red and bad for you teeth. A brick

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

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why couldn't the boy use the computer He could i meant could

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why did those sick people do 2 girls 1 cup? me and my sister got bores.

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Three men are stranded in a small rowboat. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. It became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Theres this black guy who goes to a gun shop and buys a .45 and then goes to get a permit and uses it responsibly....

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Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, people lived in it. The End.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops