A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

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The awkward moment when something of quite awkwardness occurs.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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Why did Johnny fall down? Because I threw tropical fruit at him.

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A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

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What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

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What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

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What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

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Steven and Daniel are playing with super soakers in the back yard. Steven says to Daniel: "You can't squirt me!" Daniel says to Steven: "Yes I can!" Daniel is HIV positive.

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You know what makes jokes funny? Irony You know what makes anti-jokes funny? Common sense

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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Why did the chicken itch it's bum? Cause it's bum was itchy

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A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

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Siri, what is your definition of love? "Let me check on that...Here's what I've found." Google.com search = definition of love

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What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

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Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops