- Anti Joke

Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the bat mobile? A: Robin get in the bat mobile.

What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

Why did the black man have blood on his hands? He was a surgeon

What happens when Chuck Norris jumps in the air? He lands.

my wife came out of the kitchen....

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I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

Yo momma's so fat she got her own zip code! except she doesn't because zip codes are reserved for much larger areas than that of your mother.

Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

the bible

Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

Women can vote? wtf

Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

What's the difference between a pessimist and a magnet? One is made of flesh and can talk, think and do things. The other is made of metal and can only pull things towards itself or push them away. But strangely, the latter is a lot more welcome in most situations.

Why was Martha put in a wheelchair? She was hit by a rabid cabbage.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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