Guess What!? What?! GIGGITY GIGGITY GOOOOOOOOO!!!!! (ALL RIGHT) OH.

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why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Dogs don't have thumbs.

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Why did the woman spend all her time in the kitchen? For fear of her abusive husband.

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Where there is a will, there is generally a grieving family... I miss you, dad.

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

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Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

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Q: What did the terrorist do when he walked into the football stadium? A: Set off a bomb, killing him and others there

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Slow and steady wins the race, But only in some cases. Mostly never.

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Q: whats worse than finding out you failed an exam? A: finding out you where Hitler in a past life

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One Direction???? Gifted singers???? HA HA HA

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A mum and a dad were having guests round for dinner. The daughter overheard them arguing. Dad was calling mum a b*tch and mum was calling dad a b*stard. The daughter asked them what it meant and they just said, "oh, it just means ladies and gentlemen". Later, when mum was doing her makeup, she dropped it and said oh "sh*t". Daughter asked what it meant and mum replked "it's just another word for makeup". After that, dad dropped the turkey and said "oh, F*ck!" Daughter asked what it meant and he replied "its another word for cooking". When the guests arrived, the daughter answered the door, and said "hello b*tches and b*stards. Mums upstairs stuffing sh*t on her face and dads in the kitchen f*cking the turkey".

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

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Knock Knock Whos there Me Oh, come in

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How do you make a plumber mad? You tell him that his princess is in another castle about a thousand times over 25 years.

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Why the West African Rhino is extinct? They were never Horny

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What do a plum and an elephant have in common? They're both gray, except for the plum

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So, I'm sitting by this guy in Science class and we're learning about fungi. So this guy is being really nice and I tell him, "Bro, you're just a FUNgi to hang around", like fun guy.

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Right now I'm walking down a road shoot car rhendhhdgfgdyxchdhsggggggggggggggggggggggggg

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what happens when a white guy goes to harlem he gets robbed by 5 to 10 black men

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Getting all F's on your report card isnt that bad.... I mean you could go home to find your whole family murdered and your Girlfriend hanging from a noose.

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How is a hamster like a cigarette? They are harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire

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I went to the bookstore to buy me a Where's Waldo book. I looked through the store and couldn't find it anywhere.... Well played waldo, well played.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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