You might be a redneck if someone slaps you on the back of the neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the woman get electricuted? because there was an electric fence around the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Yeah I was beginning to enjoy that as well, but I used "timed hypnosis" I have not seen it been coined elsewhere yet, not that I learn hypnosis anymore, I kinda teach it covertly to whoever I believe can use it responsively. "Timed hypnosis" is not really based upon a set amount of time after all time is relative, and our subconcious does know that and the subconcius understands that we did not invent time just because we made some fucking dials spin around" Now, timed hypnosis is based on a purpose, for example: "I will go into a trance until I am done teaching my new buddy how covert hypnosis works and teach her to use it subconciously" But now I made you aware of that, so you can use it consciously as well, the real magic here is that the subconcious is so much more efficient and powerful than the conscious mind that it would not even be neccesary to have a concious mind, except for one thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What does Mr. Newell have? - Diabetes. Mr. Newell has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what do you call it when justin beiber makes a sex tape with selina gomez? lesbian porn.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did Justin Bieber bieber his bieber? Because Bieber biebers his bieber when his bieber need a bieber bieber. BIEBER

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I lost The Game, You just did too.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A mormon walked into a bar and realised it was a bar the he leaves

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? A:blue

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Eeny meeny miny moe, Catch a piglet by its toe, If it squeals let it go, Or you'll be arrested for animal abuse and receive a heavy fine.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

There once was a man from Peru, he dreamt he was eating his shoe, he then woke up, took a shower, changed, and drove to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What goes up but never comes down? This dick

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What colour are blackberries? Purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops