Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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A man walks into a bar Ouch He broke his penis So he ate it Then he saw a little boy They shaved their pubic hair together He raped the little boy He walked into another bar Double ouch

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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What's black and white and read all over? Half a zebra.

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What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

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whats worse, being kicked in the balls or giving birth? losing an arm to meningitis

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had AIDS

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

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Knock knock Shut up

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Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

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How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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why did the women cross the road? she didnt, theres no road in the kitchen.

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I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

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Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

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Whats funny about a guy with no legs? I bought him a wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops