Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

why did the mokey fall out of the tree because it was dead.

do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

Once upon time the government was corrupt Jk, it always has been

What sucks more than being married? Being shot in both kneecaps

Why didn't Johnny go to the party? He was aborted as a fetus

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

why did spiderman fall off the roof ? cause it was wet

Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

Why is Kim Jong Un so horrible? I forgot the rest of the joke but your mum is a whore

THAT'S RIGHT, BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER BOUGHT. LOOK WHAT A GREAT JOB IT DID ON THIS PAGE YEAH! I RECKON IT IS THE BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER DIDN'T SEE

What are the two sexiest farm animals? Consider that we are humans we shouldn't find any sex appeal in animals but if i had to guess I would say Brown Chicka Brown Cow

what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

Why did the woman say ow? She was shot in the foot

My love life

Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

Why are Asian people bad drivers? Coincidental cases of blurred vision.

What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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