Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

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Why cant t-rexes clap their hands? They no longer exist

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? He didn't, animal control took the dog away from Helen because she could not properly care for the dog.

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What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

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A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

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Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

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Why do women live longer? Once their sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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Q: What's worse than finding a hundred dead babies, in one bin? A: Finding one dead baby, in a hundred bins.

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What did the Atheist say to priest? Evolution

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"Knock knock." "Come in."

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what do you find at the top of mountains? things

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What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

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What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

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Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

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It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

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God wrote this joke.................................

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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