A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

what do you call your mom? mom

Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

What did the chicken say to the butcher? Moo.

Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

How do you get a clown off a swing? You kill him with an axe

Why did Christopher Columbus sail to America? Because sailing was faster than swimming.

Have you heard the one about Tony Hawk's brother Mike? Neither has he, considering Tony Hawk only has a brother named Steve.

Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

Why did the Iraqi airline crash? The pilot was a tomato.

Why was Jerry Sanduski at K-Mart? He heard boys pants were half off!

The latter three thousand pages of this website.

What happens when you cross a porcupine, a beaver, a duck, a go-cart, a dinosaur, a star, a cheap "Big 'n Beey" bathroom, and the cookie monster? Justin Bieber. XD

Mom: Are you going to jump of a cliff just cause your friends are? Kid: You got married to dad cause you were the last lonely whore left of all your friends. And you wanna talk to me about peer pressure. Mom: Go jump.

Q: Why did the crazy man stare at the orange juice container? A: Because it started talking.

why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

Thank you, you remind me that I am not insane, just because I believe we humans can accomplish more, by uniting as one, rather than fighting one another. I feel as if I belong somewhere else, yet the question remains always, are people such as you better, or are we relics from the past?

why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 was a pussy.

I've lost my electron!! Are you sure? Yes! I'm Positive!

Yo momma so fat, when she sits on a rainbow nothing happens, as rainbows are merely rays of light refracted off of water particles in the air, apparent to humans only on a visible spectrum.

What do you call a muslim in an airport? A muslim going on vacation you racist bastard.

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

Why did they black straight guy go into an all white gay bar....? Because he went to the wrong place.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...