Why did Little Jimmy cross the road? Little Jimmy doesnt have arms and legs, silly, he cant cross the road.

What did the grape say to the bannana? Nothing.

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wanna hear a dirty joke? ...trashcan

(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

What's long, yellow, and can kill you if swallowed? A school bus

How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

What do you call 10 old black people in a barn? Used farm equipment

Whats the difference between a cow and a sheep a cow goes baa and a sheep goes moo

Gandalf and Dumbledore had a son, her name wasn't.

Microwave

Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

How do you make seven an even number? You don't, it's impossible.

what is orange? an orange

There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

Matt is a Duster!

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

why did it take the black man 1.5 hours to get out of a movie theater? he wanted to patiently wait for the movie to end.

Why didn't Johnny walk to school this week? He was dead.

Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

what is the difference between a boy scout and a jew? boy scouts come back from camp.

Do you like apples? Yes

They say you are what you eat, but i don't remember eating a big bowl of sexy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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