Men

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The Police.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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It said i can write my own joke so i did.

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awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

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Two Jews walk into a concentration camp. One goes to work and the other one gets gassed.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

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Ey hornboy give es a SCAB

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Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

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What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? I don't know. I cant think f anything big and white that fall from trees that can kill you and besides if it is big enough to kill you then you will likely see it and avoid the section of that tree lest the big white object should fall and kill you because of this it is likely that anything that is big and white and falls from trees will in result kill you.

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A white guy, a black guy, and an asian guy jump off a bridge. Who hits the ground first? It doesn't matter. They are all going to die.

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My girlfriend reckons that a small penis shouldn't affect our sex life. She may be right, but I'd prefer it if she didn't have one.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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what is the difference between my pubes and my actualy hair on my head.... my pubes didnt fall off when i went trough chemo

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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Where do cows go for entertainment? Nowhere, most are slaughtered, processed, and eaten by humans.

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Knock knock who's there Betty Betty who?` ` my grandmother who passed away 2 years ago dont talk about her that was

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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Wanna hear my impersonation of a homosexual man? I am attracted to men.

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Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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Why wouldn't Rose let go of Jack? Freddie told her that he was just a poor boy and nobody loves him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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