A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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A horse walks into a bar the bartender says to the horse y the long face the horse is unable to speak English, shits on the floor than leaves.

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Why is this joke hilarious? Because it isn't.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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A bear walks in a restaurant and asks for a table for one. Meanwhile, everyone else in the restaurant is freaking out because there is a bear in there

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How long does it take you to count to 5? 5 seconds.

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Why was the little boy inside the house instead of playing with his friends outside? His dad just died from cancer.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

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Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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women's rights

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Why did the squirrel fall out of a tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of a tree? It was cruelly stapled to the first one.

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why is it bad to smoke in a public place? Because secondhand smoke may cause lung cancer.

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I once had a friend We had our arguments, and went our separate ways.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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What did the Frenchman say to the Englishman? I don't know, I don't speak French.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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