''Today is Star Wars day :)'' ''Why's that?'' ''guess'' ''I don't know :/'' ''It's May the 4th!'' ''And?'' ''May the 4th be with you :p''

Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

Women's rights.

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

Did you hear about the new German oven? Seats 40.

What's worse than having no coffee at the office? Looking out the window on the 100th floor and seeing the cockpit of a Boeing 767.

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

why was justin sad? his family was murdered

Neither have I

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no hands. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not sally.

It's not that hard to be Dyslexic. You just have to accept it nad ovem no.

What's worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

why did bob hit Jim Because bob didn't like Jim

What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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