whats the difference between a door knob? a milk carton, because people have legs so they can walk !!!!!

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Two holocausts What's worse than two holocausts? Twilight

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why did the man fart? because he felt like it.

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A girl asked for lip balm. She put some on and her lips exploded.

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Nero, thank you for this opportunity, I desire to join the shadows, I left a thumbs up. Michelle

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If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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One day a there was a guy walking down the street. If you thought this was a joke, you're wrong.

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ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

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why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

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What do u call a boomerang that doesnt come back A stick

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

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What did the boy say 9+9 was? The Holocaust

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That`s my friends phone, I can call you from mine too if you want, please just don't hurt me, let me speak to you, I promise I will explain everything.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Yo momma is so fat, that after boarding an airplane the flight crew respectfully asked her to deboard, as with her on board the plane would be exceeding the reccomended weight, and thus be unable to fly safely.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops