What's black and white and red all over? The dead kitten on the road.

A donkey looks at a goat. The goat walks away.

dry handjob

Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

What do humans and fish both have in common? They both live underwater, apart from humans.

What did the Jewish kid get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

Why did the Hindu eat the Mongolian? He tried, the Mongolian raped him.

What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the kid? Red because he got hit by the bus.

Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

q ggggggggggggggggg

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? were both lawyer's.

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

When Chuck Norris moved into a new house he decide to renovate because he didn't like the staircase.

What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

Roses are red Babies cry Get in my bed Or you will dies

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

friends are like onions when you chop them up you cry but when you throw them out of a window, you dont

Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...