What's worse than having a worm in your apple? 2012.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One muffin turns to the second and says, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" The second muffin replies, "Holy crap a talking muffin!"

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

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Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

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how do you get an old man to fall? tip over his wheelchair

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Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

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Roses are red violets are blue. Yes.

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Want to hear a joke? Unequal rights.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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What do you call an Ethiopian with buck teeth? Lucky to have teeth.

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What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

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Whats black, blue, and red all over? A man who has just been severally beaten.

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woman's rights

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Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

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On her day off, a fully clothed stripper walks into a bar she's never been to before. The regulars turn their heads to see who has just walked in, then turn back to their own conversations.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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What did the alcoholic say to the blind man? Nothing. But he beat his wife and kids savagely.

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Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

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What is the worst thing about a couple of white kids playing with a couple of black kids? There are no parks or recreation centers within walking distance from there houses.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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