Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's been bound and gagged by kidnappers who are holding her for ransom.

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What do you call a man hit by a bus? Dead

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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"Do you know the joke No me neither?" "No..." "Me neither..."

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What's worse than kissy face pictures on facebook? The porn pictures on facebook.

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A man climbs a tree, falls, and breaks his legs. He will never walk again

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A man gets pushed in to a pole...

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What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

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Bruce Forsith's energy and charisma.

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Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

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What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

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Is maynaise an instrument?

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no

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool

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Dead girls can't say no.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

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Why couldn't the man get a job at the daycare? Because he was a serial killer/rapist.

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Why did the girl drown? She had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

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Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

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Q: What do you call an anti-joke? A: An anti-joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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