Roses are red Violets are blue That's what they tell me Because I'm blind

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Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

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I17. I17. I17. That was my best impression of a Bingo caller.

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her.

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How do you stop a baby from making bad grades? You throw a javelin at its head.

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What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

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A Terrorist walks into an airport. - He then blows himself up.

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How many republicans does it take to change a lightbulb? CHANGE?????

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Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

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how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist!

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yo mama so fat she decided to go on a diet :)

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Why did the little girl die so suddenly? The bullet got her right in the heart.

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Eh yo Sean u mr. Kingston Hey, how are you doing?

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What do you do if there's a rabid elephant chasing behind you, a vicious jaguar to your right, a rearing horse to your left, and a bloodthirsty lion in front of you? Innoculate yourself with a rabies vaccine, prod the jaguar on the nose with a stick (they hate that and will probably flee as a result), speak softly and calmly to the horse and encourage the lion to go for the elephant instead of you. You will probably still die as a combined result of mauling and trampling, and it's unlikely that you'll have two rabies vaccines to hand by chance for such situations, but your chances of survival will be minimally improved.

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What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

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there was a black guy and white guy, they were walking down a street to da bus stop, the bus comes by and says where yall goin and they say 21st avenue street; so they walk away and the black guy says(in a black voice): "wait buses dont talk!"

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Jeff comes home from a long day at work. As a result he is very tired. So, he decides to go to bed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hurricane Irene.

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What is big, hard, and bushy? My Penis. I lied about it being bushy.

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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what do you call obama a dumbass

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Why didn't little Timmy get anything for Christmas? He was an orphan living on the streets.

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joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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