I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

How come the dog didn't want to go into the sun? -Because it didn't want to turn into a hotdog.

whats white and sticky glue

a group of teenagers are laughing at a boy around their age when on says "youre stupid" the boy then replies "i prefer the term Autistic"

Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

What kind of toy do you give to a dead baby? A death rattle.

Why did the fox cross the road? To chew on the chicken carcass.

Your friend is so retarded I am getting a bit worried and his mother should take him to get tested for mental retardation.

Why did the black guy have a nice sterio? He has a well paying job and decided to treat himself.

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

Lindsay Lohan

What's worse than a mentally retarded boy screaming in your ear while your sitting in the waiting room at the doctors? 2 retarded boys screaming in your ears while your sitting in the waiting room at the doctors.

How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

How do you scare a brunette? Hide behind a door or wall until the unsuspecting person walks by, then jump out and yell.

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

What do you call a baby impaled on a stick? Lunch.

Jake: When was war of 1812? Harry: 1812 Jake: Oh.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

what did rishi say to jess ? GOOD ONE

Knock Knock, Ow my face

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

Fact: When you die, you can't eat ice cream!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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