Q: What do yoiuo call an Italian butler? A: Vinny

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

i did a 360 noscope, then i jizzed. from dylan

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why can't John hear what Muhammad says? John is deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red Violets are blue I am staraiL so dont touch me!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was depressed for a long time and decided to end his life by getting hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

CHORGLUND

thumb_up thumb_down -16

koala's try to hit on teddy bears...... desperate even though we know extinction's comin

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What would Michael Jackson do on the Moon? Nothing. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what"s short , has a tail , and is amazing ? maddy cartwright i lied about the tail!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man. The mexican got his arms shot off in the war and is severely paralyzed. God Bless our troops. Thank you for serving us.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

david weres the slug gone

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I drive in driveways. I recite in recitals. I play in plays. I park on parkways. My greenhouse is green. And my boxing ring is round. Why does everyone think I'm weird??

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Clyde: Hey John! :D John: Hey clyde! :D Clyde: :D! John: :D! Clyde: :D, :), :|, :(, D'X John: ? hey man, are you ok? Wtf is going on with you? Clyde: Man, it's not me... :'(... It's you... It's your... Your... John: My what? Clyde: YOUR FACE!!!! D'X

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Seriously, all your new jokes are shit. They are either repeats of stuff previously on the site or they are just so unfunny you'd struggle to get a sympathy laugh from your mother. Please actually take the time to think of something worth submitting or do not submit at all. We know people with no arms can't knock on doors enough now, and many things are better than the holocaust. Do something new!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops