Nero, please pick up the phone, I wont ever do that, it was a mistake okay? Stop that, my sister wont ever! My mom whatever! But if you lie a finger on my sister, I will kill you, I am at the outside, which room are you at? Tell me you coward fucker! Tell me!

How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The chicken saw greater opportunities to find food on the other side

How did the blonde reply to the male man when he asked how she was? "I'm good."

Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

Why did the white man cross the road? To pay his taxes.

Why didn't the puppy play with his toys? They were poisonous.

69

One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

Justin Bieber.

What Happened to the man who married a money? He contracted HIV

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun...

A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

Its alright for you to act like a bitch but its not allright for me to call u one

Why is a duck? Because one leg is both the same.

why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

what did the frog say to the plane HE NO CRY SO I CRY FOR HIM

Q: Why is 8 afraid of 9? A:Because 9 killed 8's family

Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

I know there are, its not the illuminati, its not reptilian shapeshifters, nor Gods politicians nor the human condition. Its society today as it stands, they did not have the right to attack us, but if we had surpassed them, they would have lost all power, they are the relics of the past, and no matter how many of them stand, they do not grow, and what does not grow, stagnates until it finally dies. Lose hope in people most all you want, but not in the few that truly believe in you for all the good reasons in the world, perhaps we are idealists, or maybe we know that with you by our side, what we see as ideals, is something you can make come true.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...