Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did little Lisa fall off the swings? She had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why does a hamburger doesn't taste like an ice cream? A: Because.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a man with no arms and legs? An amputee

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Ben has 3 apples and Charlie has 2 apples, how many carrots can fit in my anus? Banana, because cows have 4 legs

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone? Because she had no arms. Knock, Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What did the man say when he tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 20 storie building? A: Ow!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How does a printer work? You plug it in.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What day comes after Friday? Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Adam is gay tom is here that's nice

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Bradley is Sexi;P just kidding!!! fatty

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Who loves George Clooney? George Clooney

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops