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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

What is your view on school violence? I'm all for it.

A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver? Cause she was blind, def, and mute. Thus making it difficult to drive.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

A black guy walked in to a gas station, walked up to the counter and payed for his items with his debit card.

i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

A man walks into a bar. It's a fine establishment. He orders a couple of beers and takes a cab home like a responsible man would. He is then killed with a croquet mallet.

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch... The bartender calls the police as the man is arrested as piracy an act of robbery or criminal violence.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

How fast can you paint a fence with babies? Depends how fast you can throw them.

What did the Nazi put into the oven? Bread.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

You have Aids. April fools! you have super Aids.

A woman has sex with an Asian man, then a white man, and then a black man. She chooses to be in a relationship with the black man because he is prepared for the responsibilities of a relationship and the other two men, though both are well endowed, are not ready.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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