Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a Sociopath with a very violent history.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Colnel Sanders cross the road? Colnel Ryan Sanders crossed the road to attack Taliban fighters who were endangering his military presence.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Peas

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock, knock -The door's open.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did the doctor go to jail? he was found guilty of the murder and rape of a 6 year old boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

People...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What comes after 69? mouthwash

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the i pod she made the i pad!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo mamas so fat that when a bus hit her she said " who threw that pebble at me"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do the duck and elephant have in common?? Nothing, they are completely different species.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A: Knock Knock B: Come in A: Come in Who B: Your Mum...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? 17

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the ghost say when it stubbed its toe? Ow

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops