Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Cannot tell, national security. As far as I care we are friends, therefore I cannot continue chatting with you for a while, its gonna seem pretty damn suspicious, I wont be repeating myself. Except again, do not worry, we will take care of this, and if not, I will contact you, you are not in any danger for the mean being, whoever are against us are looking for "Nero", not you, and I am pretty damn safe. By the way, I never lost an eye, but your "wiz" revealed himself by sharing that information, that part was the only ploy as far as I care, and it was necessary for everybody`s survival. Do not worry friend, I will call you sometime, but I recommend we stay off touch for at least 3 months, and that you stop using this site.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, now so do you.

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

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What do you call a shoe with no laces? Stilettos, sandals, flip flops, slippers, etc...

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Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I eat mop I eat mop who? That's strange, most American's don't eat poo I'm Asian

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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What did the serial killer do when his check bounced? He promptly deposited more money into his account.

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* two sisters are making yo mam jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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Why did the loser end up in hospital? Because he was smoking glue.

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A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

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Roses are red violets are blue, I more do like pink like the holes are in you.

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Why do women go to the bathroom together? To clean their filthy pussies.

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What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

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A teenager walked into a bar. A drunk man got angry and beat him to death with a club.

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What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

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If a blonde and a brunette are both falling out of a building, which one will hit the ground first? The brunette, she jumped first.

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"knock knock" "who's there" "I dont know, check the door"

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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