What do you call a man running away from the bus? A man

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

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Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

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What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

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How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

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There's 2 guys in a Y shaped road. One road leads to a cliff with deadly alligators below the river. The other road leads to the village. You can ask both of the guys one question to which leads to the village. However, one guy always tells the truth and the other guy always tells a lie. How do you get to the village? GPS

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How did the weak old man with cancer beat it? He hung himself.

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What did the boy say when be landed in the bottom of the well, nothing he was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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How do you know when you've ritten too many anti-jokes? When you answer your own question as a rhetorical device

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wristwatch! Wristwatch who? Orange ya glad I didn't say banana

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Do you like fishsticks? Yes I personally think they are high in saturated fats, but to each his own Oh I thought you were asking if I was homosexual

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whats the diffrence between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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What's black and fast? A treadmill.

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Who gives a shit? Justin Beiber.

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knock knock whos there? IRS Oh....

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Why did Michael Jackson die Cuz

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey, I just met you

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Who let the dogs out? Their owner because he had come to the rational conclusion that they were cooped up in their cage all night and were in serious need of relieving themselves and needed love and affection

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A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

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Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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Ditto, the Slut Pokemon. Ditto is a bisexual f@ggot who will f*ck any Pokemon that moves.

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Whats the same about Jerry Seinfeld and Adam Sandler They are both comedians

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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