whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping cart? One holds groceries. The other molests small children.

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Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

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Q. What did Michael Jackson say to the banana? A. Nothing, he's dead.

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What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

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have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

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What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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The next sentence is true. The last sentence was a lie.

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A spatial closet situates trolls beside the whistle.

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Once upon time the government was corrupt Jk, it always has been

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Is that my bread? I sure hope so.

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Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

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A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

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What's more traumatising than watching your dad raping a man? Watching a man raping your dad.

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Why doesn't the fat kid have any friends? Because he is fat.

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Wheres my hood? Behind your neck.

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Three mexicans walk into a bathroom they all had to go pee.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing.

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A man builds a time machine but can only travel back in time. Where does he go? Irrelevant. Time and space exist on different planes.

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Q:what happen to amy's baby A:it was eaten by a dingo.

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I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

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What did little Jimmy get for Christmas? Presents because he wasn't poor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops