Your mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror it displays her reflection like all mirrors do

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you dint have to be a jew matt

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

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An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

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What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

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A. Why did the man crash the car? B. Because the driver was a blind man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

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Women's rights

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Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

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yo momma's so dumb she attended a dyslexic test and was proven mildly autistic.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What ever happened to Sally? We don't know she went missing over 5 years ago.

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Why did the child with one arm shave his head? He is a swimmer.

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Why was Mary mucky? Because she was dragged to a field and raped

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Godzilla steps on a bar and orders a Scotch.

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Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

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how many pancakes does it take to get fat if u answered this question your already fat

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Knock knock Whos there An axe murderer oh sweet come on in.... dinners on the stove and i am here all alone

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There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

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Women's Soccer.

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Why did the guy hate the man that said,"I respect you?'' Because the man was Hitler.

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NEVER

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops