What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? He didn't, animal control took the dog away from Helen because she could not properly care for the dog.

what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? pretty much everything because dead babies aren't a laughing matter

A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

bangers and mash?

What do you get when you cross a muffin with chocolate chips? A chocolate chip muffin.

what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

guest what i love pancakes

Is your refrigerator running? no then your food is probably beginning to rot

Why did the editor lose his job at a poetry magazine? Because he's worthless.

What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

That`s my friends phone, I can call you from mine too if you want, please just don't hurt me, let me speak to you, I promise I will explain everything.

How did the Mexican get into the U.S.A.? He came in legally, and got his green card. He then continued his life as a business man and won the lottery four years later for 5 million dollars. He then bought a cool television, he also had children and put the money in their college funds later.

Why did the black man go to prison? He committed a crime that had a penalty of several years in the state penitentiary.

Why did thomas make a big mess on the ground? Beacuse he fell of a cliff

What do you call a man who can't sing. Untalented and he should probably find a new profession

I wonder where the hell Hitler is

Poker face

What? Yes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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