Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

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if you have two gay people, would their kid be gay too? oh wait....

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A seal walks into a club... the seals freinds later inform him they are now at a bar the seal then walks into the bar... the seal was later beaten to death

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How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

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Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

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Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

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Around 10PM on a Saturday two Irishmen walk into a bar. They order up a round of drinks, and comment on the appearance of several women in the place whom they believe to be single. After finishing up their drinks, the one Irishman asks the other if he'd like another one. The other says no, that he promised his wife he'd be back soon with diapers for the baby. He thanks his friend for the drink and leaves for home. The remaining Irishman orders up another "round" from the bartender, but really it's only one drink he is ordering, being he is only one person.

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what do an elephant and a mouse have in common? nothing

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What happens when you cross a porcupine, a beaver, a duck, a go-cart, a dinosaur, a star, a cheap "Big 'n Beey" bathroom, and the cookie monster? Justin Bieber. XD

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What did the DJ play at the disco? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill? Confused, mind bruised, it seeps out It seeps out, it seeps out Face down, home town looks so grey Looks so grey, looks so grey Convexed you bend, twist and shout Twist and shout, twist and shout Stand up brush off get moving Get moving, get moving What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? (x4) Face down, home town, face down, home town Face down, home town, it looks so grey (x4) What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? (x4) More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/monster_lyrics_automatic_the.html All about Automatic The: http://www.musictory.com/music/Automatic+The

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Why is the blonde so upset? Her mother is dying from cancer.

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Why do dogs bark? Idk why? Cause there dogs

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Mike Mike who? Mike who you just called and told to come over Oh ok, come in

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Q. What do you call a woman who, after 72 hours of hard labor, finally gives birth? A. Mom.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Haiku's are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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I would write a racist joke, but racism is offensive

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This Irishman walked into a pub and then drank hard liquor for the next 3 hours.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

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what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

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knock knock whose there? my penis.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

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=3

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Your mom is so fat..., that she died of a heart attack at an early age and everyone mourned her greatl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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