A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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Roses are red Violets are blue This is an antijoke It doesn't have to rhyme.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A victim of an alcohol related car accident

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What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

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Q: What do you get when you put an ice cube, a grasshopper, a cell phone battery, and a human finger in a freezer? A: A very strange mix of objects indeed.

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Why didn't the boy's parents throw him a birthday party? Because his father is in jail for drug possession and his mother is dead.

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Q: what did i say when i crashed into the twin tower. A: nothing i was dead

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Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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What do you call a black kid on a bike? Dirt bike

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When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

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what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

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MRLSIXBWBSOVODKSHAIFKQJXIGJNRMWKSJDIVIVKEBWBEBKGKBODJWBEBJRRKFOBPBPDJWVECTNYLLNNIFUDJEBWKSOXOVOFJSBSBDKCKFKTKEBEJDLDOFIDKDJDHDBENSMSKSKSKSKSJDJDJSNRNTNTKDPQPWJSHCHCJDNEBBSJSKC

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Why did the plane crash? because there were two towers in front of it.

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Robin, get in the batmobile

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How did the black man get into college? A mop.

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

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Give to the less fortunate. Date ugly people

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Why did Sally fall of the swing set? Because she got hit with a mattress

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Ask me if i am a tree? "Are you a tree" No.

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What's green and has wheels? A refrigerator, I lied about the green and the wheels.

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Who is happpier than the grouch about the Zombie Apoclypse? Dora.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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