What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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Have you ever heard of a goose?

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What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? The bench can support a family!

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Q: What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So it could cause traffic accidents.

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What is the difference between a black man dead in the middle of the road... and a deer dead in the middle of the road? One is a human and one is an animal

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Q: If Alma have 4 corners..? A: Then there must be something wrong with Alma...

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Gay jokes arn't funny. "Come" on guys.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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What does a salmon and a falcon have in common They both live underwater except for the falcon.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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What body part do you shave other than your balls? My fridge.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots ? Rabbit Farts

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Pikachu walked into a bar. "GO, SQUIRTLE!" the bartender screamed. An epic Pokémon battle ensued, after they got drunk. The end. Pika pi!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

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Q:How do you fit ten babies into a bucket? A: A blender Q:How do you get them out? A: Nachos

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

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"Really, how is your wife?" "You know she's dead right?" "Cool mine too!" They high five in mid air and lived happily ever after

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What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

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So three philosophers walk into a bar. Is it necessarily the case that they walk into a bar?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops