What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Q. whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A. A jew is a human of the jewish religion, and a pizza is food.

What is square and grey? A grey square.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

roses are red violets are blue if u wanna fight call 111 ( we r in new zealand)

Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

What did the black man say before he went to sleep? im going to sleep

How many dead babies can fit in the trunk of my car? Seven.

Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

A woman leaves the kitchen.

black people

How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

G

Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

Hi im a joke i eat turtles

Barak Obama, Justin Bieber, and Lindsey Lohan all jump out of a plane. all of their parachutes deploy. except Justin Bieberrs, he then dies of cancer

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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