What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

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Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

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How do the Chinese name their children? They decide on a name that both parents can agree upon, and they write that on the certificate of birth.

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What did the terminally sick child dream of? I dont know. He never woke up to tell me.

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.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

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What's the song that goes like, duh duh da duh duh duh da da do?

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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(SAY KATCHUP AND LICKER AFTER EVERY SENTENCE) FOR BREAKFEAST I HAD (KATCHUP AND LICKER) FOR LUNCH I HAD I SEE MY GIRL FRIEND AT THE MALL SO I (KATCH UP AND LICK HER

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In mediavel times :A Jew rapes his mom.... He is promptly taken out of society and thrown into a lions den due to his act of imortality.

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The Kidder vs Bratman, not featuring Robbing the gay wonder: "MUHAHAhAha Bratman if you get me ill kill myself!" HOHOHOHO. "Uh okay" "I totally will!" "Go ahead" "I promise!" Bratman kills the Kidder as a favor, and no crime runs around Goodham city ever the end. Moral: Totally original nothing stolen from Joker and the Batman.

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Why is Harry Potter fake Because its a movie

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Why couldn't the tractor start? The farmer lost the keys.

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test test

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

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how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

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There are 2 men are standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is named Peter

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Why did the woman stop jogging? She got mauled by a bear.

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A black man is seen next to a dead man. Who do you call? The ambulance.

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Justin Bieber.

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If a blonde and a brunette are both falling out of a building, which one will hit the ground first? The brunette, she jumped first.

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What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

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Why did the computer load on facebook? Thats what you typed in.

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i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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