What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

Why did the little boy ride his bike to school? It was a birthday present.

-Look! Up in the sky! -It's a bird! -Yep.

Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

What's blue and smells like red paint? That blue guy from Megamind.

What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

Compton

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

If you posten bout Kony I feel bad for you son. Cause ive snached 99 children and you pst saved none jesse

Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

Knock Knock. Come in.

Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

What do cows in Africa say? Moo

Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the gay's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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