Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car and die.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. He was stapled to the baby.

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Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

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What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? She is a goner.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a banana? Banana's don't hijack planes.

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there's a blonde and a brunette jumping out of a plane, what one hits the ground first? they both hit at the same time because gravity pulls everything down towards the earth at the same pace

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what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

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what happen to the popo who got arrested? he told himself that he had the right to remain silent

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A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

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The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it made no sense

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Q:what did the Aardvark say to the other Aardvark. A: nothing because Aardvark do not have the mental capacity to carry out basic conversations

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A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding chickens cant talk and animal control was called

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When life gives you lemons, you are most likely in the fruit section of the grocery store.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

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Some of the people on this site who write these "jokes" are complete morons. Many of them believe that racism, sexism, and spamming is hilarious. Each one of them is a ****ing dumbass and needs to be removed from this site. Racism is not funny, people are murdered because of it! Those who think that they are being funny by insulting others need to get a life and stop ruining this site for others who want to read good jokes free of racism. Africans, Hispanics, Jews, and everyone else deserves better than to be insulted like this. And I'm a white, so take that you racist whores! I apologize for those of you who have good humor that have to read this, but those other jerks need to be told off.

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what do you call obama a dumbass

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God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

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What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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