How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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A program that creates "pointless inventions" and posts them at the wrong sections.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

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Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

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Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

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Why did Jonathan choose to watch something else other than Geordie Shore? Jonathan is intellectual.

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wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

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If a blonde and a feather were dropped off of a building at the same time, which would hit the ground first? A feather is a light object and would most likely float all the way down at a slow velocity, the blonde is most likely 100+ pounds and would die because she is stupid.

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Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

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wanna hear a better joke? casey.

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Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

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Why were the police chasing the black man? Because he was in such a poor financial state that the bank foreclosed his house and now he has no source of income and therefore no way to purchase basic living requirements, so he was forced to steal in order to provide food for his family.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she lost her balance.

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The Police, your mother just died of bowel cancer.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes to step on trampolines.

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What do an octopus and a cat have in common? They are both multicellular organisms that are living creatures, and therefore are both sentient and can perform simple tasks and make simple decisions.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? 0. There are no lights at Auschwitz.

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what is big and white? Your Mom

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A gay man walks into McDonald's. McDonald's serves people of all sexualities.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

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The opposing forces behind all human beings is not light vs darkness, not good vs evil, but fear vs ' love. Whatever is overwhelmingly good for one person, is evil to many. Overwhelming darkness wont allow you to see. Overwhelming light will make you blind. You can never fear overwhelming love. You can never love overwhelming fear. These are the true polar opposites, part of all emotion that drive the human being.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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