Neil is a reterd.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a paper towel and a crab cake? Ones a paper towel and ones a crab cake

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why are bacon and eggs good. Because Toasters are silver

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? We are not familiar with the specific circumstances, therefore its difficult to determine exactly why.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators are whitWhen falling from trees, they kill you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: A squirrel a chipmunk and a spider monkey are fighting over these nuts. Who gets them? A: Your Mom ;p

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Doctor, I keep believing I am stuck in the Matrix! Oh thats common, you know existencial crisis and so on but we got medications, you want the blue or the red pill?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse then getting kicked in the face by Chuck Norris? A: Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -8

nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man bought a white van, He later brutally molested a small boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the P.E. coach say to the fat kid? you need to exercise

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the black man purchase a gun? Because the man enjoys to go hunting in his spare time.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whos worse than Akise Teague. Mike Vick

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red My bulb is blue My pants are extending When I look at you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops