What's black and chrispy inside? A black guy with bonecancer

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Because it's a tornado, that's what tornadoes do.

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women's rights.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

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If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

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Why did the car stop To buy drugs

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What's the difference between Santa clause and the Jews? Santa goes down the chimney

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Roses are flowers.

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

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p

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A man walks into a bar. He is followed by a chicken, 2 donkeys, a tiger, 7 cardinals, 3 horses, 11 chipmunks, and 2 squirrels. And they all lived happily ever after. THE END

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I can be considerate if like someone is burning to death and I was the one considerate enough to lit them on fire... Wait no, I am considerate towards my friends (which are all ladies, all men besides me are obstacles and nothing else) AAAAND my logic processor broke down. Anyway, please do me the honors, take the last message.

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A pilot walks into a bar just before his last flight of the day. "Give me a stiff one to get through this last flight, I've had a long day," the pilot tells the bartender. The bartender promptly refuses the pilot service and kicks him out of the bar, since operating an aircraft under the influences of alcohol would at least constitute gross negligence and at worst, murder.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the carrot jumped over the fence? It didn't. Carrots do not have the physical ability to jump.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

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Why did the girl buy the watermelon? To eat it.

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk and leave. 2 hours later there's a newscast about two drunken men who died in a car accident. It wasn't them, the newscast about them came shortly after

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Why did the Iraqi airline crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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