Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead.

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My friend just phoned me from the Boston marathon. He was being taken to the hospital due to being injured by the explosions and had to have his leg amputated.

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Q: What's worse than tripping down the stairs in front of a crowd of people? A: The bombing of Hiroshima

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What has four legs, but cannot walk? A giraffe with polio.

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What colour is an orange? Orange. What did you expect?

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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ask me if im a door yes

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"Aids" "What?" "Yup, you just got aids­­­."

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what did the brick say to the other brick? hello. the guy next to the bricks was shocked and went home and killed his wife then later higherd an indian man to give him a lapdance.

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What did Mitch say to joe when he saw his fly was down? Nothing because he's a bagle

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What do you call a blonde in a library? Lost

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

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Your moms so old. She might die soon

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm A nimals

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What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Screw it you write the joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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