You know what it means when a priest lays his watch down on a podium? Absolutely nothing

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What's the difference between michael jackson and casey anthony? Michael jackson's dead.

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Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

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Yo mama's so fat, that we are all extremely concerned for her health.

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what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

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What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson bleeding, I spelled " red" wrong

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Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

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why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

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Two men are talking: Bob: "Do you like fishsticks?" Joe: "Yes I do." Bob: "Your a gay fish."

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What is black and has no education A tire.

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wake n shake = wake up and masterbate to a picture of drew e mom o.O

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How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

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So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

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K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

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How do you stop a black man from committing a crime? You throw him a basket ball.

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Yo mama is so fat, she's bigger than a whale. I have two fathers.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What's comfy and easy to wear? Shorts.

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a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

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Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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