What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

Ask me If I am an orange? Are you and Orange? No

Once a upon a time there were three kittens that die, the end :D

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

What do you do when life throws lemons at you? Take out your lemon shield and retreat deep into your lemon proof bunker.

Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CAsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.eircom.net%2F~cronews%2Felep%2Felep.html&ei=1aAjVMrJJcePoQS99ILADg&usg=AFQjCNEy4qvnhug3LTGYLGylpoRhxjk_zg

What did the serial killer do when his check bounced? He promptly deposited more money into his account.

High school is like forced anal sex, Hard, painful, and you cry your hopes and dreams at the end of it all.

Why couldn't Lucy get her driver's license? Because she has Cerebral Palsy!

Whats Bin Laden's favorite store 9/11

A man walks into the bar and ask the bartender for a shot of vodka. He drinks the vodka.

what happens every day? People die

Why was the boy sad? His parents died in a horrible accient earlier that day.

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

What? Huh?

Two ladies are walking down a road. One says, "It's freezing out here!" and then the other woman, who is a scientist, says "No it's not freezing. The freezing point of oxygen is -365.82 degrees F. So, unless it is actually that temperature outdoors, I highly doubt that it is freezing outside."

"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5 then all together you have $10. It was announced that the obverse portrait of Alexander Hamiliton would be replaced by the portrait of an undecided woman, starting in the year 2020. If you wait long enough, you can exchange the $10 for the new $10 bill.

Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mother's funeral.

Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...