Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

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What did the Black guy say to the Jew? Lets be equals

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How do you beat a black man in a race? You run faster then him.

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I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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What's worse than 13 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 13 trees...

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So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Who. Who who? "My name ism't really who, it's Thomas. I thought it'd be funny if I made you say who who, as though imitating an owl. However, I understand that childish jokes like that are not funny and if anything stupid and immature. I am sorry for wasting your time. I will go continue my solitary life alone in a crappy tenement... Damn government. They have money to fight wars against foreign countries and yet no money goes to feeding the poor. Do you think life of easy for me loving like this?! I'm such a lost cause not even my own parents want to see me! And I'll be damned if they're still alive. A dad who beat me and got drunk even night, and a mom with breast cancer"(Thomas, overwhelmed, proceeds to have a mental breakdown). The man at the door comes out to comfort him. "It's alright man. i'll help you out." He let's Jeffrey stay with him for the next four months. They both get raped by a T-Rex.

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How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

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whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

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Sally went to an R-Kelly concert what happend when she came out? No one because R-Kelly peed on sally and cops came in.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

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What is worse then a bus driver A man who drives an ice cream truck

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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What did the Chinese man say to the Japanese man Nothing as they have never met

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what meows and is fuzzy and smells like manure? a cat being being killed with a chainsaw next to a cow

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Knock Knock The doors already open

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your Apple ? The holocust .

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What did little Timmy find at the bottom of the well? The fact that he could no longer breathe and thus causing him to drown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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