An asian, mexican, and a black guy walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "get the hell out"

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but GET IN THE VAN

What did the mute man say to the president? Nothing, he is mute

What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

what is the difference between my pubes and my actualy hair on my head.... my pubes didnt fall off when i went trough chemo

Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

what do a black guy and a white guy have in common? neither of them are purple

If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't it's a dead baby!

What's red, crunchy, and hard to chew. A brick.

Why cant t-rexes clap their hands? They no longer exist

a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

The truth is he loves her!!

what did the chicken say to the other chicken? nothing, they dont talk.

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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