What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

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what did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? get down.

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A black guy walks into a bar orders his drink and could not do it in a more civilized way

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Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Is that my bread? I sure hope so.

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What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

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Q: which of the following is a prime number? A: 17

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42

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take away his glass of water.

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An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

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Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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Once upon a time, there was a boy. He was 12 years old. He is dad was rich from his business and so when it came time for his 12 year old boy to turn 13 he insisted on buying the boy whatever he wanted. He thought that the imagination of a 12 year old boy might in fact humour him, even if the cost of such a present reached the millions. He asked his son "Son, a very special day's coming up", his son smirked "I know Dad". "Well, what would you like?" asked the Dad. His son pondered for several seconds before replying, "honestly Dad, all I want it 12 Pink Ping Pong balls". The Dad, curious and a little disappointed asked "of course son, but why?". His son replied "I can;t say, I'd just like them for my birthday please". And so on his thirteenth birthday, he indeed received 12 Pink Ping Pong balls. His Dad thought nothing of it until next year, when he asked his son "what would you like for your birthday this year son? A new 82-inch Tv for you toilet, or how about a new jet?". His soon blew the hair out of his eyes and said, "Dad, all I want is room full of Pink Ping Pong balls". His dad again agreed but asked "why Pink Ping Pong balls son?". His son replied "I'll tell you when I get them". True to his word when the boy turned 14, he received a whole room full of Pink Ping Pong balls and his Dad asked him "now why did you want them son". But his son replied "I'll tell you next year". Rather reluctantly his Dad agreed. and then he died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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