What do you do if you work in subway? we make the subs put meat on it then put salad on then cut it then wrap it other duites involved but cba to exsplain

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

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When life gives you lemons you mix them with vinegar to make a drink that will help your high blood pressure.

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So everything, the chat we had before was all you know, a game so I would call you? I am not sleepy but I can wait until you can confirm everything.

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"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there" "BOO" "BOO WHO" "No it's just BOO"

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"It smells like Up dog in here." "How do you know what the dog from the movie "Up" smells like? It's computer-animated and not real." "I...I think I have a brain tumor..."

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC for his job interview

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Q. Whats does the kid and the dog have in common? A. The kid has Herpes.

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How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

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What do you call a pig that just took a bath? Clean!

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Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

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Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

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What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

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Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops