How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

Why is Michael Jackson bad at checkers? Cause he's dead.

did u ever hear a bird joke "no" hawkword

How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

What did one stool say to the other stool? Stools don't speak!

a cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. the cat is then escorted out of the bar because a cat in a bar is unsanitary. and they do not serve milk.

Did you know that if you rearrange the letter in "Gill Lube", you can spell "Gullible"?

Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

Roses Are Red I Have A Phone Nobody Txts Me Forever Alone

What did the def blind mute kid get for christmas? He doesnt know either

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and in turn wasting money

Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

Tim: You wanna hear an anti-joke? Billy: Yes! Tim: Okay, I've got one for you Billy: Let's hear it! Tim: 1

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because having no sense of hearing or vision she is completely incapable of operating any sort of machinery.

How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17.

Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

Q: How many jews can you fit in a car A: 2 in the front. 3 in the back and as many as you want in the ash tray.

What kind of shots does John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

orange -banana and lemon say....... i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i want to eat u (RANDOMZZZZZ)

Q: How many nuns does it take to eat a dead racoon? A: 2

How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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