How do we achieve world peace? KILL EVERYBODY. Nobody can fight when they're dead.

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A man with a blue house wears a blue shirt and wears blue jeans. Someone from a red house with a red shirt knocks on his door. He is invited in because they are friends and both have a wonderful time.

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

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Knock knock Who's there No one. The house has been vacant for years.

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If somebody chucks skittles at you saying taste the frickin rainbow Run over them with a car and say "NationWide is on your side!!! ????

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What did little Timmy get for Christmas? Abandoned

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Why didn't Hitler go to heaven? He killed millions of jews and was an atheist.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

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Q: What did Mr. Spoke say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

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Why is this joke an anti joke? Because it's not trying to be funny.

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What do you get when you mix hydrochloric acid and a humans digestive track? Death.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

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what are three short words? i a am

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Doctor, doctor, I have a cavity! Go to the dentist.

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george goodburn is secretly mexican

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What happened to the black guy who got pulled over by the cops? He was told that his left tail light was out

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about pansies

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I once did something.

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Q: what's green and fluffy? A: green fluff

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What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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