- Anti Joke

Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

A paralysed man falls over.

Women Sports.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am colorblind I hate my life

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

A man walks into a bar, he says ouch.

Jake: Where's Waldo Me: Where? Jake: I don't know

Sonny Bono walked into a bar. No, wait, he crashed into a tree.

Why did the chicken cross the road? They had a sale on dresses on the other side.

How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

Why don't midgets live in penthouses? They can't reach the button in the elevator.

How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

What did the cookie monster eat? Food

What did the tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

willam dafoe

why did the clown fall off the swing because he got shot in the face

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

There once was a mountain climber. He loved to climb mountains. He had climbed all of the world's tallest peaks...except Mount Everest. So, one day he decides to climb Mount Everest. He takes weeks and weeks to prepare himself. He trains and trains three times a day till he thinks he is ready to climb Mount Everest. Climbing up it takes forever. It feels like it has been days in the dreary cold. Finally, he reaches the peak. It is a glorious occasion. On the way down, a huuuuge storm rolls in. He falls down a cliff and breaks both of his legs. The pain is unbearable. He screams and screams but no one hears him. Finally after what seems like days, a group of monks find him and carry him to their monastery. Chapter Two Once the man wakes up he thanks the monks for saving his life. They give him a room, food, and nice clothes. Every night in his room, he hears a banging behind his dresser. It is really loud and he is quite annoyed by it. The next morning he asked the head monk what the noise is. The head monk says " I cannot tell you, you aren't a monk." He hears the banging noise every night. HE asks the head monk every morning but he always says he cant tell him because he isn't a monk. So the climber decides to become a monk. After years and years of training to become a monk, he finally becomes one. Chapter Three So he says to the head monk, " I am a monk, so now can you tell me?" The head monk replies, " I can't tell you, but i can help show you. So he pushes the drawer back and reveals a little door, He gives the man a lantern and says to go through it. The man goes through the door into a little, dark tunnel, eager to finally find out what the noise was. He crawls for what seems like hours and hours and hours and days and days and days and days. He finally gets to the door where the banging noise is and opens the door. What he sees amazes him. Do you want to know what the banging noise was? I cant tel you, you aren't a monk!

So I was walking down the road today

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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